Lifestyle

15 March 2022

Self Confidence: Build Yours Today!

Having a lack of self confidence or a low self-esteem can affect nearly all areas of your life. It can affect you while out with friends, while giving a presentation and while meeting new people, to name but a few. Confidence issues can be brought about for many different reasons and over time they become so commonplace that we just expect them to happen. If you are dealing with confidence issues at the moment, you will understand just how it can affect your life and sometimes even stop you from doing things that you really want to. Some people allow it, so it affects them getting a promotion or meeting new people. I have met people that still haven’t found a husband or wife in their 40’s as they say that they are just too shy. I have put together a list of some of the tips that I give to my clients to help them regain their confidence. 

1. Surround yourself with positivity- Positive, enthusiastic and passionate people are contagious. Surround yourself with them and allow their confidence to brush off on you. By being around positive people, we will learn how they confidently deal with things in their life that would throw us off course. 

2. Create a new image. This is a fantastic tip that will leave you feeling great. Go out and get a whole new image that oozes with confidence, new clothes, new hairstyle or better posture. When you have this new image you can act up to it with confidence and allow the new you to be born. 

3. Watch what you say to yourself- We all talk to ourselves as we think about things. We say things like, ‘Oh I can’t afford that!’ This type of inner talk can be quite negative as it closes our minds to finding a solution. Instead of saying something like, ‘How could I afford that’, it allows you to use your brain for thinking and ultimately find a solution. 

4. Make a change: move your career, house or make new friends. If you find that an element of your life is causing you to lack confidence – change it! Remember though that you set the limit on what is impossible, so open up your mind and consciously decide what you can and can’t do rather than just rely on your emotions to make those decisions for you. 

I hope that you put this small collection of tips to good use and get the confidence that you deserve and desire. I wish you the very best of luck and success.

2 Keys To Boosting Your Inner Confidence

I've been coaching for a few years now, and the biggest thing I've learnt - both for me and for my clients - is that inner confidence is the key to it all.

There are all kinds of strategies, ways of thinking, patterns of behavior and practical tips for improving your life and feeling better about yourself, but they're all redundant if the foundation isn't there. That foundation is the real you, the you that you know deep down you are. The trick is that it takes confidence to find that and to bring out who you are – here are the three keys to real inner confidence.

1. Get To Know Your Values

Personal values are a big passion of mine and I often get carried away with myself when I talk about them. I make no apology for that though – they’re one of the most important things you can know about yourself and are vital in getting genuine inner confidence. Your values are ten thousand feet down inside you, right at the very core of who you are; and they’re the building blocks, the foundations and cornerstones for you. A value is something in yourself, in others or in the world that’s most important to you, and could include things like beliefs, progress, family, fun, nature, achievement or freedom.

Why is it that some people and situations leave you feeling angry, frustrated, demotivated or deflated? It’s because one or more of your values is being denied, suppressed or repressed – and we experience that as a negative experience because it’s denying a fundamental piece of who you are. You know those times when you’ve felt really alive, amazing or buzzing? Those are the times when one or more of your values are being honored, and you can get more of that by living according to them.

Your values are all yours, and no matter what happens, no one can ever take them away. You can have absolute confidence in them because they’re there all the time just waiting for you to notice and use them. When you get to know your values, you can start to make choices and align your life around them. It’s so simple and it feels amazing, because all that really means is that you’re allowing who you are to live in the real world.

 

2. Exercise the Muscle

Confidence is a muscle, and like any muscle, you need to exercise it so that it doesn’t shrink and waste away. The problem is that, unlike your biceps or glutes, which tend to stay in the same place, your confidence muscle can be harder to find. How do you develop your biceps or firm up your glutes? By doing exercises that are designed to work that muscle over a period of time until you see the results you were looking for.

It’s just the same with confidence. Let’s say that you’re the kind of person that doesn’t take many risks, the kind of person who goes through each day doing what needs to be done and doing it well, but not really stretching yourself. You might talk yourself out of doing something because it’s too scary or because you think to yourself ‘I’m not good enough,’ ‘that’s not who I am’ or ‘I don’t really want it anyway.’ That kind of person lives within what they know and what keeps them safe and comfortable. The fewer risks they take, the less confident they need to be and, so, the less confident they become.

To work your confidence muscles, you need to be prepared to take risks – big or small. You need to be willing to stretch yourself in an unfamiliar direction, to try something new or try something in a slightly different way. You need to open yourself up to the possibilities around you and push yourself to increase what you know, what you do and who you are. The more open you are to risk, opportunity and possibility, the more confident you need to be, and so, the more confidence you’ll develop. That’s your confidence muscle – the question is, what are you going to do to exercise it?"

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