How Our Subconscious Beliefs Shape Our Life Experience

Something I hear all the time from my clients is that they generally know what they need to do to help themselves and support their recovery from mood imbalances, fatigue and chronic digestive troubles.

 

They know what they need to do, but yet, they don’t do it.

 

And that is the frustrating and confusing part. How do they line up their actions with their hearts desires, with the outcomes that they want to see in their life? And why is there so much resistance to doing the things that they know they need to do- of which are often very simple and don’t take much time or effort at all- such as consistently taking supplements or vitamins to help replete nutrient levels that they are genetically predisposed to need higher levels of, or shutting off screens 1 hour before bed for sleep hygiene and to regulate cortisol and glutamate levels, or drinking more water throughout the day?

 

In this article, we will explore the most common reasons from an Ayurvedic, Tantric and Functional medicine perspective that makes it so hard for us to align our actions with our hearts' desires and life goals. 

When our subconscious beliefs don’t line up with the things we say we want, that's when we see a lack of congruencies in our lives.

 

We say that we want a relationship and are actively trying to build one but it keeps not working out no matter what we do. Why? Because deep down, there is most likely a desire to not have a relationship that is stronger than your desire for a relationship.

 

But Bonnie, I DO want a relationship- what do you mean I have a desire to NOT have a relationship??

 

Let's break down the different roots of desire.

 

We can have soul or heart desires, and then we can have superficial desires, that is desires that come from our vikalpas- (rule that rules all other rules but that separates you from your purpose). If our superficial desire is stronger than or different from our soul desires, it will always win. So, for instance- if in childhood we witnessed abusive relationships and swore to ourselves we would never be in a situation like that, then we might develop a superficial desire to keep ourselves safe at all costs and value self-preservation over anything else.

 

This desire gets tucked away deep in our psyche, and we often forget it's even there, or don’t know that it was ever created in the first place. Now fast-forward to the present day when our hearts are yearning for a relationship. They are both true desires- but whatever one is stronger, will win. And for most of us, it's the superficial desire or the vikalpa that wins until we do the inner work to transform our physic garbage and rise above its limiting dynamics that keeps us from authentic lives. 

 

 

 

Failure of the intellect/Prajnaparadha 

 

The Cause of Disease According to Ayurveda is Failure of the Intellect, or Prajnaparadha. Because of stress we think of ourselves as separate, the body starts to function not as a whole and as individual parts, the mind is the thing that incurs the most stress and that stress alters our microbiology which sends more messages to the brain to go into panic mode. Where did this mindset of survival come from? 

 

Emotional stress- the first 6 years of our life make up 95 percent of the things we think and do as adults. This means we are talking and thinking in an unconscious way because we are basing our reality off of young impressions and our need for survival. Reward chemistry has been taken to a whole other level- we are addicted to feeling good and instant gratification- shopping, snacks, money, cars, etc. we are addicted to the reward chemistry. Trauma and emotional issues are experienced in the heart- and that is transferred into our brain called tarpaka kapha- those old impressions are written into the white matter in our brain and the make us think and do the same things that are not serving us-they helped us at some point but not anymore. 

 

Tarpaka kapha has to do with cerebrospinal fluid aka lymph or brain lymph. An estimated 3 lbs of plaque and chemicals are drained out of the brain while we sleep every year! Research has since found that brain lymph is linked to anxiety, depression, inflammation, autoimmune disorders. You can move lymph in the brain through different ayurvedic practices. 

 

Emotional trauma can cause the accumulation of congestion in the brain lymph. Tarpaka kapha protects the brain from emotional trauma. The brain lymphs that have been discovered by western science in last 10 years (ayurveda has known about brain lymphs for thousands of years) are the sagittal sinus and the transverse sinus? Up to 50% of those lymphs are drained through your nostrils and your sinuses. The ayurvedic practice of nasya is sniffing medicated oils in through the nose into the sinuses to encourage detoxing of brain lymphatics. Brain lymphatics if congested with trauma and emotion, we are going to have a much harder time moving on from bad habits and patterns. 

 

Ayurveda helps us become more conscious- so instead of 95 % of our thoughts and actions coming from impressions from the first 6 years of our life, we are making choices based on the present moment- consciously. 

 

That's one of the techniques of unraveling the mental ama- which impacts our gut health and microbiome. 

 

The bugs in our gut know when we are stressed, they know when you are engaging in manipulation to get approval from others, they know when you are safe and secure and not threatened- they know when you are sitting NEXT TO SOMEONE WHO IS STRESSED, and they change and become stressed out accordingly.

 

They are designed to feel everything. If we eat food with pesticides on it, for instance, and the microbes on that food have genetic mutations that come into the gut, that genetic material goes through our intestinal wall called horizontal transfer of genetic material.

 

This transfer of the genetics of the bugs on the pesticide laden food goes into your gut and then to your genetic code to tell your genetic code there is a threat of some sort and you had better prepare for it by preparing yourself genetically to handle those traumas or genetic mutations, so that those threats don't take out your body.

 

The bugs in our gut want to make sure we stay alive because we provide a home for them, so they help us develop defense mechanisms in order to survive- even if those defense mechanisms end up hurting us in the long run.

Mental, emotional and physical toxins build up as a natural part of life, but when not processed and eliminated in a timely manner due to systematic dysfunction within various tissues, this results in ama, or toxin overload. There are both physical and mental signs of ama, or toxin build up. Here are some of the most common ones- 

 

• Joint pain and achiness
• Frequent colds, mucus build up, sinus congestion, or coughs 
• Constipation, diarrhea  
• Brain fog, difficulty focusing 
• Poor memory 
• Weight gain/difficulty losing weight
• Skin rashes or acne
• Bad breath or body odor 
• Gas and bloating 
• Cysts of any kind 
• Poor appetite
• Low libido or sexual debility 
• General feelings of stagnation or dullness

 

Again, impression from the first 6 years of our life get written in the white matter of our brain and make us think and do the same things over and over again that irritate and changes your microbiome, the microbiome sends a message back to your brain, an emergency message through your whole body on however you are genetically coded to breakdown or proclivities you have towards disease based off your genetic code, those genetic expressions get triggered. 

 

Dopamine and Cleanses

 

Our happiness is dependent on reward chemistry- get the new job, the snack, the car, the validation, etc. Ayurveda said let's create a sattvic environment within ourselves and around us to rise above the basic reward chemistry dependency. 

 

Ayurveda helps raise our consciousness so that we are aware of when we are manipulating those around us and ourselves in order to get love and validation based on that reward chemistry addiction that is based on our primal need for approval from mom and dad in our beginning years. 

 

The more dopamine hits that we get from social media, food, money etc, the more we need domaine. We need more and more of it to feel as fulfilled as we did the first time we got that reward, and we need it more often. Hence we have this addiction to the reward chemical. 

 

If we don't get rid of the mental ama, it will continue to alter our gut and our microbiome health. This eventually leads to physical ama like constipation and or diarrhea, inflammation, chronic joint pain, autoimmune disorders, hormonal imbalances, etc. 

 

Cleanses should always start with restoring digestive function or lymphatic function. Ama is always fat soluble toxins- when you burn fat you are detoxing physical and mental toxins out of the body. 

 

When doing a physical cleanse, it's a great way to start doing the internal inquiries and introspective work of meditation so that we can begin to identify habits and thoughts that are unconscious and keep us in loops as well as threatening our physical health, and start to detox those as well. Nasya therapy started as a way to release emotional trauma.

 

Join my mailing list to reserve your spot during my live Seasonal Cleanse Groups that I host 2-3 times a year when we learn all about the art of Ayurvedic mental and physical cleansing; eradicating brain fog, weight gain, cravings and mood imbalances at crucial times of the year!

Changing our emotional patterns comes down to increasing our neuroplasticity, that is our ability to create to neural pathways in the brain, our ability to create to habits and perspectives. Ayurveda knew the importance of neuroplasticity thousands of years ago, and gave us the time tested tools to support our neuroplasticity- pranayama, chanting, meditation and nasya therapy being the main ones.

 

Pranayama (intermitent hypoxia), chanting, meditation and yoga asana are some of the most effective ways to change the white matter in your brain which releases the emotional trauma we store and dictates 95% of our thoughts and behaviors. Ayurvedic goal was not to heal just physically or emotionally but spiritually as well in order to reach higher human potential. We only use 10% of the brain- and most of that is because 95% is used up from unconscious patterns from the first 6 years of our life. Imagine if we actually became conscious- what we could do? Ayurveda says we can do better than that. That is what ayurveda is about. That's what Ayurvedic cleansing is about. To get rid of the mental, emotional and physical baggage by restoring proper functioning of various systems in the body and the brain.

 

Benefits of pranayama kumbhaka: protects your genome, increases stem cells, increases nitric oxide, increases EPO (Lance Armstrong was injecting this), protects endothelial lining.

 

The mind is the thing that incurs the most stress- and that stress alters our microbiology- which sends more messages to the brain to go into panic mode. Where did this mindset of survival come from? Emotional stress- the first 6 years of our life make up 95 percent of the things we think and do as adults. This means we are talking and thinking in an unconscious way because we are basing our reality off of young impressions and our need for survival. 

 

Trauma and emotional issues are experienced in the emotional heart- and that is transferred into our brain where it effects Tarpaka Kapha- (governs the functioning of our sensory organs, our perception of sensory experiences, provides lubrication to the brain tissues, nourishes entire nervous system)- those old impressions are written into the white matter in our brain where they make us think and do the same things over and over again even though they are no longer serving us. (addiction, sabotaging relationships, emotional eating, over-functioning/over working, etc)

Changing our minds and our habits is so much more than will power. In fact, I often tell my clients that will power is the least of your worries. Will power is overruled by our subconscious beliefs, as well as physiological imbalances, which we will cover in the next section. Will power burns out if you don’t have solid mechanisms in place that justify the energy necessary for sustained will power. 

 

For instance, if you are using will power alone to stop smoking, yet haven’t examined the triggers behind the need to smoke (besides the addiction/habit- but the actual triggers associated with smoking), or if you don’t have other processes or tools in place to replace the smoking, then that success rate is often very low. Will power does however have a significant place when it comes to dedicating our energy to achieving the goal, though it should not be the only, much less the main tool that we use to achieve our goals or change our habits. 

 

In this case, we will examine will power under the lens of Shakti. Shakti means power, cosmic energy, divine feminine energy, and the central deity within one of India's many theological traditions within Hinduism, Shaktism. 

 

The intensity of your Shakti (force behind the impulse) plus the intensity of your Vayu (energy invested in the process) have to be stronger than your Karma. This will equal the Prapti (goal/desire) 

 

SHAKTI (POWER OF DESIRE) + VAYU (METHODS/ENERGY YOU PUT IN)+ KARMA (RESISTANCE INTENSITY) = PRAPTI (SANKALPA/GOAL)

 

• Karma is based on the law that every action has a reaction. In this life as well as in past lives, every choice you made has ripples. Some actions have bigger effects than others. Those ripple out and then back at you. Like a reverberation. In the context of the yoga teachings, you came into this life with a whole bag of Karmas. Things that are going to happen in your life and that you will be asked to work on.  

 

• During your lifetime you create new Karmas. This all creates resistance. One of the manifestations of that resistance is the false belief. The false belief is the thing that justifies your Vikalpa. When we start to deal with the Vikalpa (rule that takes you away from your purpose), then it doesn’t have so much power over us and then we are reducing our Karma. By articulating your Vikalpa (the belief getting in the way of your soul’s desire)-  You have started to reduce your Karma. Through spiritual practice you can reduce your Karma and how much it affects you. 

 

Let's look at the levels of Shakti, or will power

 

• 1^st level In its simplest form- Shakti is called a wish (Abylasa) 
• 2^nd is An intention (smatvakarma)- it becomes a part of you. 
• 3^rd level is Icca Shakti- indomitable will
• 4^th level- Sankalpa Siddhi is a super Sankalpa. Power of the miraculous. (Jesus and the fish) (Bengali Baba and the famous court case of him bringing someone back to life) Their will is synonymous with the will of ultimate reality

 

• Our current habits have more power than Shakti. That is why you need to grow your Shakti- your sense of inner power. 
• People will respect you more for living to a higher purpose. Even if in the beginning there are uncomfortable with you changing your life and how that affects them. 

 

TOOLS TO GROW YOUR SHAKTI—

 

Meditation, journaling, working 1:1 with a coach or mentor, changing a habit, Yoga Nidra, Mantra japa, sangha and community—all work to reduce habits and increase your shakti.

 

HABITS: if you deliberately change a habit, it’s like putting money in the bank. When you change a habit, what you’re saying is ‘I want to be more conscious’, and then, in response the universe gives you back support. 

 

 

Nutrient Deficiencies Causing Low Energy, Motivation, and Brain Fog 

 

This is a huge area of topic for me and clients and a major contributing factor as to why I started Functional Medicine school in the first place. From my own personal experience with CPTSD, brain fog, fatigue, hypothyroidism and hormonal imbalances such as weight gain and cystic acne- I found that one singular modality for healing was not sufficient.

 

Psychology would address some aspects, but not all. Conventional medicine approach was really not sufficient at all, running standard labs and telling me everything is normal, but they could offer me an antidepressant (which in many cases is life saving and an invaluable tool, but should never be the only tool used or considered the end all answer), and even Tantra and Ayurvedic practices weren’t touching the complexity of what I was experiencing. 

 

What I found through working with a Functional Medicine + Ayurvedic Doctor and running what felt like 100 blood tests, was that in addition to my psycho-spiritual karma that I was working out via my mental health challenges, but that I also had considerable genetic predispositions to nutrient deficiencies and that I was under methylator, which was a major contributor to my depression, anxiety, ADHD, and many other symptoms. 

 

Together we put together a plan that addressed all the areas- specific pranayama and mantra practices for my spiritual health, trauma therapy with a licensed trauma therapist, and a variety of herbal and physician grade supplement protocols to help balance essential nutrients, hormones and neurotransmitters. 

 

Supplementing my genetic variations was a huge missing piece in my healing journey, of which I had already been on for at least 10 years. Everything shifted significantly once I started pairing the power of Ayurveda and Tantra with the modern precision of Functional Medicine.

 

So please keep in mind that whatever your health concerns are- it’s crucial to look at all sides of the human experience. As humans, we are spiritual beings. It's essential that we address the spiritual, but also the physiological components that shape our health. The power of combining modern medicine and ancient wisdom is immense! I and dozens of my happy clients are proof of the efficacy of this approach. Healing takes a team. That's why I work on a team of Holistic and Functional medicine providers on all my client cases, so that we are covering all our bases- addressing the spiritual, mental and physiological. 

 

Lack of Joy and Balance in Life Leading to Self-Care Procrastination 

 

Last but not least, is the procrastination of self-care or doing the work that needs to be done in order to achieve the desires of our heart. Where does this come from?? A LACK OF JOY! When our daily life is full of duties, obligations, stress and not balanced with any sense of joy, or fun, or pleasure, or peace- then what often happens is a form of procrastination, or revenge. 

 

Sleep procrastination is a common form of procrastination, particularly "revenge bedtime procrastination," is a behavior where individuals delay their bedtime to engage in leisure activities, often due to a lack of free time during the day. This concept has gained attention, especially during the COVID-19 pandemic, as people's routines and stress levels have been significantly impacted.

Key aspects of sleep procrastination include:

• -Behavioral Patterns: It involves delaying going to sleep without a valid external reason, like illness or an event, and an awareness that this delay might lead to negative consequences.
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• -Psychological Factors: Often, people engaging in this behavior are aware of the need for adequate sleep but still choose to delay it. This can be linked to a need for recovery time from stress or an attempt to regain some sense of freedom lost during a busy day. It's also related to the tendency to procrastinate in other life aspects and is associated with lower self-regulation skills.
•  
• ​​​​​​​-Consequences: Regularly sacrificing sleep for leisure activities can lead to sleep deprivation, which negatively impacts mental, physical, and emotional health. It can cause issues like fatigue, impaired memory, relationship troubles, increased risk of various health conditions, and a lower quality of life.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

• -Management Strategies: To combat sleep procrastination, it's important to find relaxation moments during the day, establish a calming bedtime routine, create a clear separation between work and personal life, and maintain consistency in sleep schedules.

 

​​​​​​​​​​​​​​The concept of sleep procrastination highlights the importance of balancing leisure and relaxation with the essential need for sleep. Integrating downtime without sacrificing essential sleep is key to maintaining optimal wellness.

 

​​​​​​​And this brings us full circle, in the sense that in order to balance our life and do the things we know we need to do, we must address the underlying beliefs that are subconsciously shaping our thoughts and choices. 

This article delves into the challenges people face in aligning their actions with their heart's desires and life goals, particularly in the context of health and wellness. It combines perspectives from Ayurvedic, Tantric, and Functional medicine to explain why people struggle to perform seemingly simple self-care tasks like taking supplements, maintaining good sleep hygiene, or staying hydrated. Here's a summarized outline of the key points:

• Impact of Subconscious Beliefs and Emotional Stress:
  • Subconscious Beliefs: The article explains how deeply held subconscious beliefs, often formed in childhood, can override conscious desires. For instance, a past experience might create a subconscious desire for self-preservation that conflicts with a conscious desire for a relationship.
  • Emotional Stress in Early Years: It's noted that the first six years of life significantly influence adult behavior and thought patterns. Emotional stress during these formative years can embed certain survival-oriented mindsets, impacting actions and decisions in adulthood.

 

• The Role of Ayurveda in Conscious Decision-Making:
  • Ayurvedic Practices: Practices like nasya (medicated oil sniffing), pranayama (breath control), and meditation are highlighted for their role in improving mental clarity and helping release emotional trauma stored in the brain. This aligns with the Ayurvedic belief in the importance of cleansing mental and emotional toxins (ama) to improve overall health.
  • Gut-Brain Connection: The article discusses how emotional and mental states influence gut health, further emphasizing the interconnectedness of mental, emotional, and physical well-being in Ayurvedic medicine.

 

• The Importance of Joy and Balance in Self-Care:
  • Lack of Joy Leading to Procrastination: A key point is that a lack of joy or pleasure in daily life can lead to procrastination in self-care routines. This is particularly evident in the phenomenon of "sleep procrastination," where individuals delay sleep to engage in leisure activities as a form of 'revenge' against their hectic, joyless schedules.
  • Balancing Leisure and Sleep: Effective management strategies for sleep procrastination include finding relaxation moments throughout the day and establishing a consistent sleep schedule, underscoring the need to balance leisure and relaxation with essential self-care practices.

In conclusion, this exploration into the alignment of actions with heart's desires and life goals, through the lenses of Ayurvedic, Tantric, and Functional medicine, reveals a multifaceted approach to health and wellness. It underscores the profound impact of subconscious beliefs and emotional stress, particularly those formed in early childhood, on our adult behavior and decision-making. The article highlights the significant role of Ayurvedic practices in enhancing mental clarity and emotional release, thereby fostering a deeper understanding of our actions and choices.

Moreover, it brings to light the critical importance of incorporating joy and balance in our daily routines. The concept of sleep procrastination serves as a poignant example of how the absence of leisure and relaxation can lead to a neglect of essential self-care practices. This paper emphasizes that the journey to overcoming challenges such as anxiety, fatigue, digestive issues, and limiting beliefs is not solely about willpower or knowledge. It's also deeply rooted in understanding and reshaping our subconscious motivations, embracing holistic health practices, and ensuring that our lives are enriched with joy and balance.

The insights offered here provide not just a roadmap for better health and well-being but also a call to introspection and holistic living. By integrating the wisdom of ancient practices with modern medicine, we can embark on a more conscious, fulfilling journey towards achieving our health goals and realizing our true potential.